8/4/05 Bad Idea

I picked a more orange hue for Azalea’s skin this time around. Your web browser mileage may vary. I thought it would be funny and fitting if she had that spray-on tan “Oompa Prompa” look which plagues some of the yupchiks who I guess don’t have the funds or patience for one of those more high end salons I think they use when they don’t have time to go to the Hamptons. One of these days I’m going to have to write a Too Negative story set in the realm of Heaven rather than Hell. I have some vague and murky ideas of what Heaven is like in the Too Negative universe. Although on closer inspection my thoughts may actually be of the Scottsdale mall. Wait, was there even a mall in Scottsdale? Fuck if I know, I didn’t grow up in Scottsdale. But if there were a mall there it would TOTALLY be it. Did I mention my high school football team was called “The Matadors” and the mascot was a grotesque ethnic caricature of a Hispanic man? Anyway…

There were some brief glimpses of Heaven in issue #5 of the Too Negative minicomic, but they were pretty non-specific. The crux of the story did not take place there. I think of it as a harsh realm where citizens are heavily policed as to their thoughts ,actions, who they associate with, etc. Which may be why I’m equating it in my head with more affluent parts of Arizona. Anyway, if you also need brain-bleach after thoughts of such things, here’s Richard Emmanuel’s “Church” installation in Gloucester, MA. Tony Millionaire linked to this footage one day and now I look at it when I’m freaked out and it’s kind of soothing. I really want to visit the real thing someday. Legend has it you used to have to burn a dollar at the door in order to get in.

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