“Rot” (preliminary sketch)

Image based on the butoh exercise we did yesterday. I’m going to turn it into a color painting. But it needs…beetles.

Tonight’s exercises involved cracking stone walls and insects crawling inside your body. I usually only feel like that’s happening when I’m on the verge of an “episode.” Now I’m deliberately entertaining the idea. The instructor says part of this artform is working with that which disturbs you. I don’t know if decaying flesh and inner-organ insects are gonna get me there though. New project: Yuppie Dudebro Gentrification Butoh.

NOW I’m disturbed.

When we got home I saw an email that the outdoor art event at Le Petit Versailles this weekend is cancelled because it’s going to be rainy. I guess that’s what happens when I use “upcoming art show” to justify spending $45 on art supplies at Blick. I’m preparing! I can make it back selling small works!! Except now I’m out of a place to sell them. For now.

I’m sort of calm about it though because I was getting to the point of feeling overwhelmed with things going on. But I hope they can reschedule it.

In the course of writing this now I’m unsettled because the topic of necrotic livers came up. Talking of people who are ill and who have been deceased. I guess organs and decay can disturb me after all. Just not in my own body removed from that. My own body, the vessel for last-ditch healthy harvesting, relatively speaking.

A late night hideout for ice cream trucks:

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